Isn’t it sad to think that once upon time we were all innocent? Not the innocence in terms of whether you committed the crime, I’m talking about something else. For example my 7 year old sister still believes she can become a tooth fairy as a job when she’s older. At what point does that go all away? At what point do you wake up and realise that all those stories aren’t true and that you don’t always get a happy ending?
The innocence I’m talking about is where your parents knew everything, you had the choice of whether you wanted to work or not and the only issues you had were your friends at school being mean to you.
It’s why being round children is so scary. You just have to slip up once and suddenly their innocence starts to shrink. The more one understands about the world, the worse it gets.
In reality people lie to us day after day, until we get to a certain age and then they throw all of the truth into your face. And no it’s not as dramatic as I’ve described it but you still have to be careful. Children are meant to live care free, exciting lives. It’s why they are filled with so much imagination, if only I had published fictional books when I was younger.
Some people do grow out of that naivety quicker than others. But suddenly you begin to realise there are bad people in the world and no super heroes to save you. The news is always filled with murders, rapes, kidnappings and that tiny percentage of the news that isn’t depressing, is about a study that tells you bacon causes cancer.
As a society we are terribly negative in the way we think. For example when someone does get raped we go and blame the victim for what she was wearing, or how she was acting, instead of actually punishing the person who did it.
No wonder 1 in 10 of us is depressed.
I’ve haven’t come out to my parents and I’m 18…
Now I appreciate that coming out as gay or lesbian is a lot harder than bisexual, even in the 21st century and for those who have it more difficult than me, I pray for you guys.
The problem for bisexuals is that the majority of people still believe we are “confused” or “just experimenting” or “going through a phase”. And I’m not disputing that some people may be confused or trying new things out but for the ones who know they are attracted to both sexes to be told they’re not, can be infuriating. For some reason I think I may know who I’m attracted to more than anyone else.
Over the last couple years different sexualities have come to light that before people didn’t know existed or didn’t know there was a word for whatever they were feeling. All the oldies who are resistant to change, work in a way where if they don’t understand it they don’t believe it.
So how did I know I was bisexual if I had never done more than kissing with a girl? Because I knew a girl that I found very attractive and I’m pretty sure I gained a crush on her like I would with any other boy.
It wasn’t just a “yeah that girl is hot” kind of feeling. I was imagining doing things to her, not necessarily sexual, even just cute couplely stuff. Unfortunately I have a boyfriend and she was straight so those feelings went away after a while. But whatever I have felt for boys I have felt for girls at one point too.
My parents and my older brother have openly discussed how bisexuals are confused and I wouldn’t know what would happen if I were to come out. I would also be worried about being treated differently by people not just my family. I am happily together with my boyfriend for almost two years and I don’t see it ending any time soon. In reality is it worth me coming out to my family if I am in a happy and committed heterosexual relationship?
I could rant all day about what being bisexual really means and maybe I’ll write another post in the future. Contact me if you have any suggestions on this post or any previous ones.
Do you ever have something planned out and then you go to write and you take a step back and realise it is a pile of shite? For me that’s this blog.
The problem is I have all the motivation in the world, I just don’t have any ideas. I have never been diagnosed with OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) but I’m pretty sure I have a tiny bit within me. I hate odd numbers and I love routine and everything in my life to fit into place. So the thought of finishing college, getting a full time job and then every day being able to come home to this blog, it physically excites me.
Which is where I have the motivation. But considering I’ve been a creative writing student for the last two years, I’m not the most creative unfortunately.
As well as showing people my talent in how I write and the variety of topics I can write about, this blog is also a challenge for me. To research, to plan, to redraft and redraft. To get used to the way the writing world works.
The other problem I have is we live in a society where follows, likes etc. are more important than ever and half the time I decide not to post something due to my paranoia. The more I look at my writing the worse it looks and I then don’t feel comfortable posting it.
I’m sorry for this post not being as exciting as I would have liked, I’m just letting you know that for the first few days possibly weeks I may be a bit rusty in how I will run this blog.
And no I don’t mean that giant, burning thing in the sky.
After going through about all careers possible, I finally found something I could see myself doing for the majority of my life; writing.
Unfortunately unless you’re someone like Stephen King or J.K Rowling you are unlikely to make a living writing fictional stories. Also once you grow a certain age imagination is very hard to find. So I decided to go into journalism.
Once I got help out of dad and his weird connections with the most random of people, I was able to spend a week at the sun’s newsroom doing work experience. It was a great experience and anyone out there who is able to get the opportunity I definitely recommend it.
And although no my dream of them offering me a job at the end of the week because I was that amazing did not happen, I was still able to get a few articles published on their website. Every time I saw my name pop up on the screen as I scrolled through the recent stories written, a little part of me inside jumped up and down. I will put the links down below for you to check out my proof and see I’m not lying.
However during the days once I completed the task of research or writing they had given me I felt like a little puppy as I was continuously asking “What can I do now?”
I am a very curious person and interested in the unknown, also a little scared. That’s normally why people are scared of the dark because what is inside the dark room tends to be unknown. This is why I enjoy journalism as you are able to research topics you technically might not know anything about. Then any knowledge gained you are able to share with other people. After studying psychology for a level, alongside creative writing, I am also intrigued by the human brain. My dream come true would to be able to get into journalism where I could write about psychological topics. However I will be happy with getting out of retail to begin with!