The only way to accept joy and happiness is to empty your heart with any hurt or pain from the past. You can’t let people who have emotionally hurt you fill up your life forever.
So here are a few tips on how to move on:
1. You have to make the commitment of letting things go, it won’t happen on its own. If you don’t make this conscious decision than you will continue reliving the past until you make the choice of moving on.
2. Express the pain you feel. Whether that’s directly to the certain person or whether you speak to a friend or write it in a journal. You have to get it out your system and this will also help with understanding specifically what hurt you. You must also accept your responsibility in the situation. It may appear like none of it was your fault but see if there was anything you could have done to stop this from happening. This will also help if a similar situation were to come up in the future.
3. Stop being the victim. Yes, you’re special and your feelings matter but unfortunately the world doesn’t hugely care about your problems. Remember everyone has their own problems, it’s called life. Rather than dwelling on the negatives make the choice to focus on the positives that have come out of the situation, even when it feels like there’s none.
4. Focus on the present. There is no need to constantly think back to the past for you don’t live there anymore. You can’t undo the past but what you can do is to think about today and all the promises you have to live for. If you crowd your brain with past hurt emotions and memories there is no room for the new happiness in the present day.
5. The last thing is to forgive them. You don’t necessarily forget about their behaviours that caused you this pain. But everyone deserves forgiveness. Forgiveness is not a weakness it is merely showing them that you are a good person and just want to be able to move on from the past.
Moving on from past events can be hard and it’s not a quick process either, but the sooner you start to change the way you think the better life will seem.
My Book: “Letters to my Past”