Relationships are based on trust and if you can’t trust anyone, you are depriving yourself from human connection. It is involved in all the interactions we have on a daily basis. No one would board a plane or walk the pavements, if we didn’t trust that other people would take their responsibilities seriously.
Maybe you find it difficult letting anyone in. Perhaps you used to be comfortable sharing your hopes, dreams and demons. But not anymore.
Sometimes you trust someone enough and they prove to you how much of an idiot you were. And you got burned.
Some of us can get up from our fall and move on. Others decide this is end and will never be able to fully trust again.
In reality when you say “I don’t trust anyone”, you’re really saying “I don’t trust myself”.
We are afraid to trust someone because we mainly fail to trust ourselves. We don’t trust in our ability to keep it together when others fail. We don’t trust that we’ll get things done. We don’t trust in our ability to open up and rebuild after we lost.
Another thing is that you have to allow to people to come in and build a relationship. If you’re giving such negative energy all the time, people will move away from you.
Being betrayed or knowing of a close friend who was betrayed can cause a lack of trust. You start to think that the same thing will happen and that people are going to continuously leave you. The benefits of closeness or intimacy and outweigh the possibility of pain or betrayal.
The action of being able to trust others isn’t on a equal measurement. Some people will be born finding it easier to trust others than other people. Some may even be better at judging trustworthiness than others as well.
Your ability to trust is due to your upbringing as an infant as well. If your parents or caregiver attend to your needs, than you will learn that you can trust others and can turn to others for support when needed. Although you could have a brilliant childhood and have something happen as a adult which causes these trust issues and vice versa.
Trust in relationships is as vital as oxygen to a scuba diver, it is impossible to survive without it. Whether it is due to you having unrealistic expectations, your childhood or past hurt, we have to move on from these reasons and let people in to achieve trust-filled relationships.