My boyfriend and I are going to celebrate our 2 year anniversary in the next week. It’s going brilliantly actually. A lot longer than all my other relationships by a mile.

However the two responses I get when I tell people how long we’ve been together are:

“Aww that’s cute/Congratulations/Well done” and,

“Don’t you think you’re too young to settle down?”

We met at the beginning of college so we were both 16/17. As people our personalities, our attitudes towards certain things and our behaviour in general has changed over the two years. We’re definitely not who we were when we first met.

I was self-conscious, slightly underweight and I constantly wanted attention. He was isolated, immature and uncaring. He had just come out of a 1 and a half year relationship and I had been dumped after 2 months for about the third time. We each had our flaws as does everyone. And we still have some flaws now. Nobody is perfect and no matter how “in love” you are you will always see their flaws. Loving someone means seeing those flaws and sticking by their side anyway. It doesn’t mean you find your other half to be perfect.

Everyone always says you shouldn’t settle down before 25 because your early 20s are the best years of your life. You get to have fun, you get to experiment. You get to do anything you want to without having to think about someone else.

Who says you have to be single to have fun?

As a couple we can do all the same activities single people do but together. We can go abroad together, go out clubbing together, binge watch Netflix shows together and so on. I quite like the idea of when I’m going out at night to have someone there who I know will look after me.

Maybe there are things I wanted to do that I haven’t been able to do because I’m in  relationship. In reality it’s more there are people I have wanted to do that I haven’t been able to because I’m in a relationship. But you get over that because having a long-term relationship is worth it.

But being a young person in a long-term relationship means we’ve experienced things together that we wouldn’t have experienced if we only met in our 20s. Such as college drama and possible university arrangements.

A lot of couples break up due to university, more precisely fresher’s week. Students go partying, get drunk and end up sleeping with whoever. So couples either break up before university or get their heart broken whilst at university.

Once my boyfriend goes to university we would have been together for almost 3 years. If he was going to cheat on me then he would have done it already.

I know some women who get to the age of 30 still being single, wanting kids but have no one to have them with. They then rush into the next long term relationship they can find.

Sometimes your soul mate comes at a perfect time and others not so perfect. But if you don’t take that chance you might not get a second try.

I’m not saying we are going to last forever. But if we did last forever, it wouldn’t upset me.

Grace x

 

3 thoughts on “Did I Settle Down Too Young?

  1. I think everyone sees ‘settling down’ as different things. I would see a long-term relationship and different to settling down as I would see that as moving in together and kind of starting the rest of your life together. But either way it’s not unusual or ‘too young’ to be in a long-term commited relationship. I’d just say it shows maturity -although there’s nothing wrong with wanting to be young and single either. 🙂

    Like

      1. This is true but I guess I just don’t like the phrase ‘settling down’. Just because the two of you are young individuals who want to be in a monogamous relationship doesn’t make you un-normal. There are plenty of people similar ages that prefer these types of relationships to others but I suppose a lot of people assume the ‘normal’ for younger generations is just to sleep around..

        Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s