Is Being Unhappy A Choice?

I try to be a happy person most of the time, however, like some, I have my down days where I feel emotionally drained and unmotivated to do anything. These days where I feel my worst are also the days I just want to curl up into a little ball and cry.

Is it the fact I am constantly reminding myself that I feel miserable by trying to find this “happiness” that causes my unhappiness?

Happiness is quite a difficult thing to measure and therefore it is hard to become something when the definition is very vague.

Another thing that tends to cause unhappiness is self-worth. Self-worth is basically how much someone thinks they are worth as a person. Obviously, the lower your self-worth is the more unhappy you tend to be. If you constantly compare yourself to others who are around you and see yourself as all of your imperfections, then yes you may feel sad from time to time.

The assumption of human behaviour is that people go out to seek pleasure and avoid pain, evolutionary it is how we have been designed. However, there are people out there who will use absolutely anything as an excuse to be unhappy. Sometimes what happens is people are almost competing against one another on “Who Has The Shittest Life?”

Is it because people enjoy feeling unhappy or that they are scared to feel joy?

Psychologists have found that some people who tend to enjoy watching horror films also tend to be happy when they are unhappy.

Happiness is complicated and people find it in different situations. In difficult situations, optimists can still find a way to feel happy about what is going on and some will always be unhappy despite having everything in front of them.

In some cases, happiness can be a choice as we choose our reactions, behaviours and how things impact us. But unfortunately, there are many people who suffer from mental health problems, which decide to control our feelings. People don’t choose to be depressed or anxious, it just so happens they are.

Gracie x


Twitter: @gracievhemphill

IG: @graciehemphill

3 thoughts on “Is Being Unhappy A Choice?

  1. I just stumbled across your post, and to be honest, it spooks me out a little because I’m currently trying to understand the cause of my unhappiness, and why my brain keeps on telling me I’m better off like this. It’s a great post though, keep it up 🙂


  2. Good post, Grace 🙂 While it may be that people do not actively try to make themselves unhappy, many people forget that positivity and optimism can be influenced by how we choose to perceive the world and the factors that we surround ourselves with. There are things that are out of your control, but you can make the decision to love the person you are! Thanks for the post and I’m sending love your way 🙂


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