Category: Advice

Beauty or Brains?

Beauty or Brains?

According to most romantic comedies, there are two personality types when it comes to females. The first one is the hot blonde with the perfect figure but an imperfect grade. Whilst she may be a solid 10 out of 10 she is annoyingly stupid but most people let her idiocy slide because of her good looks.

The second type is the reversed, nerdy girl who focuses more on getting straight As than on socialising. Whilst she may know the works of Einstein she is disgusting to look at.

According to society, women can either be beautiful or be smart, it is almost unheard of to be both. You have to choose whether you get married or get a degree.

When I talk about beauty I mean naturally. I’m not talking about being able to look like walking perfection after spending an hour on your face because anyone can look good with makeup. That is its main purpose, to cover certain flaws and make you look better.

In terms of the brains side of things, no one is expecting you to be an autistic genius who can do difficult mathematical sums in a small amount of time. As simple as it sounds even having something such as common sense can make you come across as smart. Ironically common sense isn’t actually that common?

Another thing that makes woman smart is being passionate about something. For example, I wouldn’t necessarily I am the most academic person. It is why I am sat writing this blog rather than trying to continue my education in uni. However, I would say I have a passion for writing. Whether it be this blog, my book of poetry or anything. Having ambitions can make a person smart rather than moping around never knowing what do with one’s life.

We live in a shallow society and whilst the brains would get people places quicker, we are obsessed with being attractive. With apps like Snapchat and Instagram, it is all about beauty these days. Don’t worry your child might not know their times tables but at least they know they need good lighting when taking a selfie.

If mirrors and cameras didn’t exist would we care less about our appearance? Whilst yes you would still have other people commenting on your looks would you care if you didn’t know what they could see anyway?

Out of the two, I personally believe brains is the superior. It is more important in the long run and the one that will stay with you forever. At the end of the day when we all turn old we will no longer beautiful, but at least the smart ones will still have their brains.

But remember, whilst it may be rare, it is possible to be both beautiful and smart.

Gracie x

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Is She Gay?

Is She Gay?

After being alive for 19 years I have noticed several things. Firstly, everything you enjoy in life either makes you drunk, fat or depressed and secondly working out if a girl is gay is quite difficult.

Homosexual men are generally quite easy to point out. They’ll talk in a slightly higher pitched voice and use a lot of hand gestures. They tend to have good fashion sense, great hair and are normally into independent and powerful female celebrities; such as Madonna or Beyoncé. They also tend to be drama queens, however, that might stem from their obsession with the influential female celebrities. Now I’m not suggesting all gay men are like this but the majority are.

Whilst stereotypes are mainly there to insult and mock other people they can sometimes be useful, in this case, we can normally tell if a man I straight or not by taking note of certain things.

Without boldly going up to a girl and going “Are you gay?” how can you tell if the girl is lesbian or bisexual.

There were a few things to look out for that could make it more obvious that the girl was gay. But nowadays everyone is cutting their hair short and wearing checked shirts. Short nails seem to be a reliable clue that she may be gay but even then that’s not reliable, she may just work in a phone shop.

If people could just wear a sign around their neck stating if they were straight, bisexual or lesbian that would make this whole flirting situation a whole lot easier.

Another thing that makes flirting with girls difficult is the fact that girls who are friends with other girls are already pretty close naturally. Girl friendships have very little boundaries on what can or can’t be done. A group of close girl mates will constantly tell each other how good looking they are and everything else. So, when a girl tries to give another girl a compliment she may just see it as being friendly rather than flirting.

For your information, if I call you cute it is because I’m trying to be gay. Homo definitely intended.

Moral of this blog post is that if you’re a bisexual or lesbian girl can you try to act more gay, please?

Gracie x

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Unrequited Love Isn’t Romantic

Unrequited Love Isn’t Romantic

Unrequited love is one sided love, it is when someone is loving someone else in isolation and not getting anything back. When one isn’t getting enough attention from anyone else they will love and love someone even though that person treats them like shit.

It is disgusting, weak and self-destructive and yet we have all at one point done it.

Why do we bother with the goose chase? Why do we bother going after people who don’t love us back?

We constantly feel we aren’t good enough for we have decided that self-worth is dependent on this other person. If they can’t love you, then no one can, right?

Let’s think about this logically; why do we want them so badly if they don’t love us back? When someone shows you a lack of interest that is a signal for you to move on, not to try harder. It is so much easier to let go of something that will never work than to continue wasting your effort.

As cliché as this will sound the main reason we allow people to treat us like shit is because we don’t love ourselves. We treat ourselves like shit. We accept the love we think we deserve, so we allow those to treat us how we feel we should be treated.

If we don’t believe we deserved to be love at all then we will find ourselves a match to people who also believe we don’t deserve to be loved. These people will take advantage of you over the fact you have feelings for you. They will lead you on, they will play games, they won’t call or text you when they said they would. All because they know that you love them.

Instead of moving on and finding someone else who does actually love you, you continue to let this person play games with your feelings for that’s what you feel you deserve.

Just because this person doesn’t think you are amazing doesn’t mean you’re not.

Gracie x

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White Guys Get Away With Everything

White Guys Get Away With Everything

A few months back there was a case where a rich white boy called Brock Turner. He sexually assaulted a 23-year-old women whilst she was unconscious. He should have been sentenced for 14 years but instead got a lenient sentence of 6 months due to the fact he is an athlete and staying in prison for that amount of time would affect his progress. After 3 months he was released.

Something about white boys in chinos. They get away with everything.

The criminal recently wrote a statement discussing how the event had affected him. How traumatic it must have been to sexually assault a woman.

Instead of taking responsibility for his actions and showing remorse for his behaviour he blamed it on the “party culture”. He blamed it on alcohol and the risk-taking behaviour you have on a night out.

If every time someone got drunk they committed sexual assault alcohol would have been banned by now. Regardless of the alcohol, you would have committed the crime. Same with people who cheat on their partners. They could have done it sober but then they wouldn’t have an excuse to tell people.

“A steep price to pay for 20 minutes of action”. This lovely quote was said by the criminal’s father. He said this as he believed that 6-month sentence was too severe on his son. This comment alone makes me sick. It suggests that a woman’s main purpose in life is to be there for men’s needs. Whilst that may have been the case in the olden days when women were nothing more than owned property it is definitely not the case now.

And don’t lie, Brock, you didn’t last 20 minutes.

I think there should be a blanket rule for whenever someone commits a serious crime; if you’re a dickhead you get punished.

The only thing that causes rape is a rapist. No amount of alcohol, drugs or clothing can make that anyone else’s fault.

Gracie x

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Why Won’t Anyone Commit?

Why Won’t Anyone Commit?

Whether it be a job, a relationship or a TV series, people are struggling to commit these days. We have a shorter attention span and believe everything we do has to be amazing and once that excitement is gone we have to quit and move on. We believe we are entitled to having the best and when we don’t we are constantly looking elsewhere.

With new apps being built every single day there is the ease of getting whatever you want whenever you like. You can order dinner, apply to a job or get a date with the touch of your fingers.

We are overwhelmed with all these choices and options, why would we ever stick to one?

In terms of dating we will always have two options; one is to experience intimacy with a verity of different people and to enjoy yourself in the moment and see where life takes you and the other option is to spend time with that one person, not only can you be intimate but you can tell them everything and know they will be there to support you no matter what.

As people grow and mature they will value their life experiences differently. Some people will always want to have a true connection with one person and some people will have matured and never get to that point. There is no set rule that you have to settle down.

Beforehand it was natural to find someone to settle down get married and have children. But now with more things being more socially acceptable, it isn’t always the case that everyone will settle down.

Even if you believe you don’t I’m sure in the back of your head this is true, but we all have a list of things we want to be able to tick off before we settle down. Some examples are, to travel more, to be in a certain place in your career, to have had more fun and adventure, to meet and sleep around with new people. Because once you settle down, that’s it. You’ll have less freedom as you’ll constantly be having to bear in mind about that other person. And you’ll definitely not be able to sleep around.

But what happens if you meet your soul mate and you haven’t achieved what you wanted to?

Well, the relationship ends. Not because it couldn’t have worked out but because one-half of the couple wasn’t ready.

Hey guys, just before you go I’ve been working on something for a while now and I wanted to tell you about it.

I’m publishing a book. It’s going to be a book of my poetry and quotes that I wrote when I was in college.

It shall hopefully be out to buy on Amazon by June. I will keep you updated and shall post the link once it is available to purchase.

Gracie x

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Tea, Anyone?

Tea, Anyone?

For those of you that live under a rock, something that has been advertised on virtually every social media platform recently is these “detox” and “weight loss” teas and coffees. The main aim of them to do rid your body of any toxins by drinking a cup of either tea or coffee every morning and evening. Apparently, by getting rid of these toxins in your body it will promote fat burning and therefore you will be left with this lovely toned body by losing weight. The main companies you would have most likely seen advertised are ‘Fit Tea’, ‘The Skinny Coffee Club’ and ‘BooTea’.

Now whilst I have never actually used any of these teas or coffees before I have studied biology in the past. Whilst I may have failed biology A Level, I’m pretty sure your liver, kidney, and lungs tend to get rid of any nasty toxins in your body.

Another thing these companies do is they always advertise the drink with some tanned, toned girl in her underwear drinking the tea or coffee.

This is stupidly unrealistic because firstly, it is dangerous to consume a hot drink in your underwear because you could spill it and burn yourself. More importantly, this drink isn’t going to make you toned or tanned for that matter.

Detox is just a fancy name for laxatives. This drink will just make you shit yourself.

These companies understand that those who buy their product want to lose weight in some way so sometimes they offer recipes or meal plans to help with one’s weight loss journey. Most of the reviews show, on any of these products, that those who changed up their diet as well as drinking the tea or coffee lost the weight. However, those who continued to eat as they were whilst drinking the beverage didn’t lose the weight.

It’s not the overpriced drink that is helping you lose weight. It’s your change of diet.

But then you knew that. You were just hoping for an easy route to get to your dream figure. The only way you are going to look good is if you work for it.

Gracie x

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Career or Children?

Career or Children?

Most people in their 20s start to plan out their life. Working out when the right time to have children? Or working out what career path to take? And then you must work out what you want to achieve first; a family or a career? For a lot of people beforehand they could have both children and a career.

However, the economy is fucked.

People in their 20s and 30s can’t settle down with anyone because they can’t even move out of their parents’ house. You can’t really plan on having a family in the same place you used masturbate vigorously during those nights as a lonely teen.

As suggested by the lower birth rates a lot of people decide to spend their time and effort focusing on their career rather than having a family.

The prices of houses have continued to rise however, the wages have not. A lot of young adults see owning a house as a goal they would hope to achieve than something they can see happening in the foreseeable future. I should be happy with the amount of money I have been able to save but I’m not, as it is nothing compared to the deposit I shall need to buy a place of my own.

For those who decide to move out into rental accommodation until they have the money to finally own a place of their own, they will become unstuck. I understand there are certain circumstances that mean you have to move out and rent. For example, if you have to be closer to a university, if you are getting kicked out or if you can’t hold back the urge to kill your parents anymore. But if you are just moving out for the sake of moving out instead of saving you shall be spending all your wages on rent.

Not only will you not be in a financially stable position to have children you may be stuck renting a flat or apartment and physically won’t be able to cater for them either.

Before any of you middle to old aged people pipe up, I’m not just moaning for the sake of moaning. This is a serious national problem and it doesn’t matter if we look at moving to Scotland or fucking London we are all struggling.

Whilst I don’t want any children I am scared of the fact I am possibly going into one of the lowest paying jobs ever. Fucking writing. While it may depend on what route I go into it is still pretty low pay compared to other careers. However, I am passionate about writing and therefore the money doesn’t bother me too much. As long as I can move out of my parents’ house before it gets embarrassing, it should be all good.

A lot of young adults who want children are scared that that isn’t an option anymore. You want to be able to give your child the world, not bring them up in a state of constant instability. For many of us, we also have this biological clock ticking in our ears, constantly reminding us that we don’t have all the time in the world to waste.

What makes the least amount of sense is that all the high paying jobs are in the big cities. However, to own a property in one of the big cities is a joke. So a lot of people taking advantage of the better jobs are already financially privileged? Seems a little unfair.

We are constantly being treated like we are whiny bitches that haven’t grown out of our adolescence yet. But in reality, a lot of us crave to be an adult and to gain that independence.

Oh, but don’t worry about me, I’m just a spoilt millennial who is used to always been giving everything I want.

Gracie x

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