Causally Suicidal

Causally Suicidal

I don’t when this became a thing but every other post on social media is people joking about suicide. Whether it is a picture of a noose with the caption “Hang in there” or a picture of a bottle of bleach being in the “Back to School” sale. And I’m sure I’m not the only one who laughs at these depressing jokes. But why do we laugh? Is it because we find it funny? Relatable? Is it a coping mechanism to make us feel less uncomfortable?

It isn’t just online where people are joking about their suicidal tendencies. You can be at work or at school and suddenly someone jokingly tells you to kill yourself. I doubt they expect you to respond with “Well I was planning to last night”. You’re meant to laugh it off and see it as a joke.

I have never been one to take any of these jokes seriously and I would be lying if I said I never joke about suicide myself. Sometimes at work, I say, “This is so boring, I want to kill myself”. Do I mean it? No, I mean I have a very low tolerance for boredom but I don’t want to kill myself because of it.

Whilst we have been talking more about mental health over the years I still don’t think we have grasped the concept of suicide. “13 Reasons Why”, a Netflix TV show, tried to portray what it is like to be suicidal. However, the creators of that show didn’t do a brilliant job as they suggested that suicide was some form of revenge. Kind of like going “Ah he rejected me so I’m going to kill myself”. Which isn’t the case, you don’t kill yourself for any people’s sake.

And I realise being alive today means I probably have no expertise in the subject of suicide. But normally people kill themselves either because the chemicals in their brains don’t work the way they are meant to or because multiple things over time got too much. It would seem petty and a waste of time to kill yourself over what someone else did.

We may be aware more of mental health but there are still some habits we can’t break out of. Men are “pussys” for crying and women are “bitter bitches” for getting angry. But why? All we are doing I being human. If someone was full of joy and happiness 100% of the time there would probably be something wrong with them. We all have our down moments, some more than others, and we should be allowed to express ourselves in those moments.

I think we need to stop over sharing online and under sharing in person. We can happily tell everyone online in some form of humour that we want to die but we can’t tell the people around us when we are feeling a little down?

It doesn’t matter how uncomfortable the other person gets if you are feeling suicidal, tell someone rather than expecting them to read between the lines of your Facebook post.

Gracie x

My Book: “Letters to my Past”

Facebook: facebook.com/graciehemphill98

Twitter: @gracievhemphill

Instagram: @graciehemphill

Break-Ups Aren’t Rocket Science

Break-Ups Aren’t Rocket Science

Relationships are the biggest part of our lives and when we are ancient and going through the memories of our lives, we aren’t going to be thinking about the little things. We won’t be thinking about our grades or our studies or how much chocolate we did or didn’t eat. We are going to be thinking about our relationships and wishing we did spend more time with the people we love. Whether your relationship is bad, good or great; no one likes breakups. No one likes losing a person that once spent so much time in your life.

There has been research and studies to show that breakups aren’t easy. However, there are things you can do to make it easier.

For example, delete your ex off any social media accounts. Whilst you may believe you are strong and thick skinned seeing them happy with other people isn’t going to make you feel any better. And if you really think you can’t control yourself, block them too. This will stop you typing their name in the search bars whilst you’re drunk at 1 in the morning. Again, it won’t do you any good.

Another thing would be to delete their number off your phone. To go a step further delete any message threads you may have. Basically, delete everything that may give you a chance to dial in their number. Unfortunately, if you have photographic or eidetic memory, I’m truly sorry as I have no advice for that. Is there a way of erasing memories possibly?

If you had been together a long time and know their schedule pretty well don’t purposely go out of your way to try and “bump into” them. It will come across as weird or creepy. And, what exactly do you think you’ll achieve by doing this? Because let’s be honest here, you’ll achieve nothing.

Whilst break-ups aren’t the easiest thing in the world, you can’t sit there crying yourself to sleep and feeling sorry for yourself if you aren’t doing anything about the situation to make it better. You are continue to purposely put yourself in situations that will cause more hurt then you are just asking for trouble.

Gracie x

My Book: “Letters to my Past”

Facebook: facebook.com/graciehemphill98

Twitter: @gracievhemphill

Instagram: @graciehemphill

 

Body Positivity Vs Body Honesty

Body Positivity Vs Body Honesty

As a society, we go around telling people that they should be happy and confident with their body shape no matter what. We have to go around telling fat and overweight people that they are beautiful and should be accepted for all their flaws.

And I think it is great and all that people can feel more comfortable in their skin. However, it would be the same if you went up to someone who had a bunch of scars down their arms and you told them that they are accepted and should feel comfortable self-harming.

Whilst it may not be physically noticeable at first being overweight or obese can cause a bunch of illnesses, including diabetes or heart disease. This means every time you tell a fat person it is okay to be fat, you are also telling them it is okay to die.

Not only do fat people lead a shorter life and they are seen as less attractive. So, anyone who is overweight, please tell me the benefits of you staying that way?

Whilst I’m talking about the overweight side of the scale I’m sure if someone was extremely skinny or anorexic, people would be worried about their health as well.

Bullying someone to lose weight is never an effective solution, however, I believe we should stop this fat acceptance movement as people will sit in their unhealthy bodies until it is too late. Yes, you can be skinny and unhealthy but you can never be fat and healthy so stop with the bullshit.

You don’t have to go on some fancy diet or do extreme amounts of exercise to lose weight. The main contributor to being overweight is normally portion sizes. It is most likely the case that the person is overeating and consuming more calories than they should be. You could technically eat MacDonald’s everyday and as long as you ate within your calorie allowance, you wouldn’t gain any weight.

I understand that not everyone is blessed with the perfect genetics or the most amazing body. And I also understand that some people find it more difficult to maintain a good weight. But we need to stop with this body acceptance bullshit.

Being overweight and obese is unhealthy. Simple as.

Gracie x

Facebook: facebook.com/graciehemphill98

Twitter: @gracievhemphill

Instagram: @graciehemphill

My book: “Letters to my Past”

 

Having a Mental Illness Isn’t Pretty

Having a Mental Illness Isn’t Pretty

Can we get one thing straight; mental illnesses aren’t pretty. Just because you’re extremely sad does not automatically mean you have depression. With any illness or disease, doctors have to make sure the individual checks enough boxes before they can give a diagnosis. Each illness has then a set of complex symptoms that you have to be experiencing. If a doctor were to get a wrong diagnosis it would ruin their reputation. Doctors wouldn’t spend 7 years in education if it was that easy.

Also, Google isn’t a doctor. If you seriously think you’re mentally ill go to an actual one.

Since the birthing of Tumblr, mental illnesses such as depression and anxiety have almost been seen as desirable to have. Having a mental illness can affect your daily life to the point of not being able to hold up a stable job.

I get it. We are constantly told to stand out and not follow the crowd like sheep. However, one in four of us suffers from depression so in reality, you’re just like everyone else.

If you are going to fake a mental illness, choose Antisocial Personality Disorder because being a sociopath seems a lot more interesting than being depressed.

(I’m hoping you detected the sarcasm in that last sentence)

Mental illnesses aren’t some personality quirk some people have, they are life-consuming. Most people who do suffer from them feel embarrassed getting help and you’re there picking all the easy symptoms to have. In all honesty, it is disrespectful for those who have actually been diagnosed.

Paedophilia is a mental illness, shall we romanticise that one too? No, I didn’t think so.

Eating disorders are another mental illness that seems to be romanticised. There are even posts on Tumblr that talk about self-control and how some people wish they could be anorexic. That’s not just romanticising, that’s actually telling people that it is attractive to have an eating disorder. Some people are naturally skinny and some are not. You shouldn’t be forcing the idea of an eating disorder down people’s throats. If you want to lose weight, change your diet and exercise more.

Who said that being skinny to the point of being able to see someone’s ribs was even attractive in the first place?

Are people trying to seem more interesting?

It is not like you go up to people and say “Hi, I’m Grace and I’m mentally unstable”.

There is a difference between being sad and having depression or being anxious and having anxiety. No human is a completely emotionless robot but there is a difference between suffering from mental illness and just experiencing a normal emotion.

Grace x

Facebook: graciehemphill98

Twitter: @gracievhemphill

IG: @graciehemphill

Why Don’t We Congratulate Skinny People For Staying Skinny?

Why Don’t We Congratulate Skinny People For Staying Skinny?

Recently, on social media I have seen a lot of before and after pictures of people who have lost weight to become a slimmer version of themselves. For those who have been able to achieve that, well done. I know staying motivated is hard work sometimes, although it does help to take pictures every so often so you can then see your progress.

I’m referring to those who change up their diet or start doing exercise. Those who resort straight to liposuction I feel are cheating the system. It doesn’t matter how good the plastic surgery was, if you continue your eating and exercise habits the way you are, all that weight will come back on.

As a society, we congratulate overweight people for losing weight but not skinny people for staying skinny, why is that?

Overweight people are clearly doing something wrong to their body, hence the reason they are overweight. Whether they are eating processed and unhealthy foods or whether they are just eating twice the amount they need, it is obviously a problem that can be changed. Not necessarily an easy change but you know what you’re doing wrong. No one is asking you to go the gym every day but if you did something as simple as cutting down on the portion sizes or cutting out ready meals and takeaways, you’ll notice the difference.

However, whilst some skinny people happen to have good genes or a faster metabolism, some just take care of their body and stay the weight they are. If a skinny person tried to take a picture and put it on social media, with a caption that talked about how they have looked after their body all their life and had stayed the weight they have, they wouldn’t get the same congratulations as the former overweight person.

Is it because it looks likes more effort is required to go from fat to skinny rather than from skinny to still skinny?

Think about it. Fat and overweight people get bullied a lot. Whether it is directly or indirectly, overweight people get reminded every day about their figure, how they don’t reach certain standards of beauty and are then seen as possibly unattractive to some people. Also, they sometimes get called lazy or unmotivated. Whilst all this fat-shaming is harsh and unnecessary does it help motivate overweight people to lose weight?

No one is giving skinny people the motivate to stay the weight they are. I am a fairly slim girl, always have been luckily enough. Even when I was at my heaviest, I was still slim and therefore no one really said anything negative. Whilst it may be harsh sometimes people need that push. For example, my drama teacher told me I couldn’t act, whilst it was harsh if it wasn’t for him I would still be trying to become an actress.

I’m not saying going from fat to skinny is any harder than staying skinny or vice versa. However, I would like a little appreciation every so often.

Stop Joking About Pregnancy on April Fools

Stop Joking About Pregnancy on April Fools

It’s the first of April tomorrow, which means it is April Fools. For those who don’t know what April Fools is, it’s a day where people try to succeed in doing funny pranks on people. For example, sticking a bunch of sticky notes so that it covers someone’s car. Whilst it is a mild inconvenience and isn’t massively hilarious to the person who owns the car, it is harmless.

And that’s what these pranks should be. Harmless.

Nowadays, people tend to do their pranks based on social media. They will post something on a social media platform that won’t be true and see how many people fall the gag.

Sometimes people pretend to be pregnant and will go as far as posting a fake ultrasound picture to their social media profiles. Now for the majority of people, this prank will be harmless. But for those who grew up wanting children and not being able to have them, this will hurt.

Think about it. Pretend you are someone who ever since you were younger has always wanted to have a family of your own. You maybe even came up with a couple names and how many you wanted. Now imagine you have spent years of your life trying to conceive with your partner. You go to the doctors, just in case. But you believe you are overreacting and that you’re worrying for nothing. You’re sure this happens to everyone.

Now, imagine how heartbroken you’re going to feel after the doctor tells you you’re infertile. That you will never be able to have children no matter what you do.

A few years down the line you’ve either adopted, used a surrogate mother or given up on having children altogether. It is April the first and you log into your Facebook. A friend is pregnant and even posted a picture of the ultrasound. They never mentioned anything but maybe they just wanted to be sure.

You go to write a comment, congratulating them. Whilst you are jealous that you have never been able to have children of your own, you have to be happy for them. If the circumstances were different they would be happy for you.

As you’re scrolling down the comments you realise that it’s a joke. That your friend pretended to be pregnant for April Fools, thought it would be funny. You are full of so much rage and anger because you’re sat there not being able to have children and it breaks your heart every day and people decide to make a joke out of it.

The prank may seem harmless. But it isn’t harmless to everyone. Unfortunately, life has its ups and downs and not everyone gets what they deserve. You will have people on your social media who can’t have children but want children of their own.

Also, it isn’t the most original prank. Choose something that will make you stand out.

 

Are Waist Trainers Even That Good?

Are Waist Trainers Even That Good?

Recently, I have seen a lot of articles popping up on social media about waist trainers. My first thought when I first saw them was, “What a load of bullshit, these can’t be any good for your body”. So, I did some research and I was right they don’t do your body any good in all honesty.

For those who don’t know, waist training is when you wear a type of corset for several months that creates an exaggerated hourglass figure. As the corset gets tighter and tighter it is able to pull the woman’s floating ribs and even rearrange her internal organs to reduce the circumference of her waist. Traditionally, you had steel-boned corsets but recently we have latex waist cinchers which women tend to wear as part of their workout routine. The results are semi-permanent, so even once the hourglass figure is achieved you have to continue wearing it anyway.

Companies selling the waist trainers also claim that you will lose fat and weight from your waist, metabolise fat and reduce your daily food intake.

The problem with that statement is that most of the waist trainers nowadays are made out of latex. If you’ve ever had to wear latex gloves, you’ll realise that the material makes you sweat very easily. If you are then trying to work out wearing the waist trainer, you’ll lose water weight from the sweat rather than fat. Therefore, as soon as you go to drink water or eat carbs, you’ll put the weight back on.

Another thing is that they state you can lose fat from your waist and make it smaller. However, you can’t pick and choose where you lose weight. The only reason you would lose weight whilst using the waist trainer is because you’re shrinking the size of your stomach so that you are reducing your daily food intake. Whilst that might sound great it is always healthier to stick to a diet rather causing damage to your body just to look good. It is like when people diet they tend to lose weight all round instead of one particular area. It is also not permanent, so after a while, your body will go back to the shape it was.

The thing that struck me is that there are so many obvious signs to suggest that these things will have a negative impact on your body. You are literally trying to fit your internal organs into a smaller space. This means wearing a waist trainer for a long-term period can cause digestive problems, rib damage and difficulty breathing. Especially if you decide to use it whilst working out. This is because your lungs won’t have the space they need to expand and therefore you won’t be producing another oxygen to work out. You’ll slowly be suffocating yourself as you deprive your body of oxygen.

Unfortunately, as much as we all want the hourglass figure, with the small stomach but big bust and hips, it isn’t possibly. Even the most athletic don’t necessarily have the hourglass figure, you either have the genetics or you don’t. A piece of material won’t change that.