“It could be worse…”

“It could be worse…”

You don’t have to be grateful just because it could be worse.

No matter what you are going through there will always be someone out there who has it worse than you. That doesn’t make your situation any less relevant. It also doesn’t mean you’re not allowed to be unhappy just because you aren’t experiencing the worst situation ever. Whatever you are experiencing is just as valid as anyone else’s situation.

Same goes for trauma, some people assume that what happened to them doesn’t matter because it “could have been worse”. Whether it was physical, sexual or emotional abuse, whatever happened to you is as valid as what happened to the next person.  

Telling people to be grateful “as things could be worse” is making the assumption that mental illnesses such as depression are down to one’s circumstances when it is caused by incorrect levels of certain chemicals in the brain.

Even if someone isn’t suffering from any mental illness and is just feeling down don’t force happiness onto them. It is extremely draining trying to be happy when you’re really not feeling it. People are allowed their down days.

Now, obviously if a loved one hasn’t left their bed in days then go help them out but if they are just feeling a little down in the dumps and they want their space, then give it to them.

More importantly what exactly qualifies someone to feel sad? You keep saying things could be worse but how worse do things need to be before someone is allowed to feel sad? It’s stupid really. Being sad and feeling down isn’t a competition. Whether something is happening in your life or you’re just feeling down, it is allowed no matter how much worse it could be.

That’s another thing. People can feel down or sad and not have a reason. They might just be having “one of those days” or genuinely can’t figure out why they feeling the way they are. Don’t continue to pester them they don’t need an explanation for their feelings.

Regardless of how far worse your life could be, remember your feelings are always valid.

Gracie x

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My book: “Letters To My Past”

If It Doesn’t Affect Me, I Don’t Care

Now I realise this may upset a few people due to recent events, but compared to most I probably have more of a logical brain rather than an emotional one.

I used to worry unnecessarily about a lot of things that were out of my control.

I’ll give you an example, you know those adverts where they show starving or dying African children? The way they get your money is by using distressing or disturbing videos and pictures to make people sympathise with the children. However, for people like me, I don’t care.

I understand that it is a global problem and I’m not ignoring the fact that there are children and adults dying daily due to poverty. But if I gave money every time I saw those adverts I would be in poverty myself.

If it isn’t something I can personally control or prevent then why should I waste my time worrying?

Like the title states; if it doesn’t personally affect me then I don’t care.

Obviously, recently there was a bombing at Manchester that killed and injured several children and adults. Whilst it was upsetting to hear about it, I didn’t know anyone in the location and therefore it didn’t affect me.

Let’s look at it logically. Terrorists cause damage to places to cause fear in people. If we are constantly scared and in fear, after each one of these events, they’ve won, right?

A lot of people use events like these to gain popularity on social media. If you were to post something on any social media platform about an event such as this one when it is happening, you are guaranteed attention. Whilst most will hate me for not caring enough about disasters that are happening in the world, at least I am not using them as some sort of gain or profit.

Now, just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I wish for anything bad to happen to anyone. Whether it be domestic abuse, gun violence or a terrorist attack.

Another thing you have to bear in mind is when there are these mass killings some people post things such as “My thoughts are with the families who lost their loved ones” on social media. Firstly, as thoughtful as it is, it is going to do fuck all for the families who have actually lost loved ones. Secondly, about a thousand people die a day from various types of cancer, so why haven’t you put that status up for the cancer patients’ families?

In general, people tend to concern themselves with topics that excite them or are somewhat relevant. Perhaps if the Manchester bombing had happened in a country that wasn’t the UK or America, it may have got less publicity. The fact it was at a concert also increased its publicity as a lot of the teens or young adults may have been using any social media platform at the time of the bomb.

There have been many lives lost in the past that haven’t been recognised due to the fact it wasn’t as unpredictable as other events.

Why should one death be more significant than another?

Grace x

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